Friday, November 11, 2005

Shingles for Robertson

Once again Pat Robertson has channeled God to let us know that the people of Dover, Pennsylvania should be prepared for God’s wrath after they voted pro-intelligent design advocates off the school board.

According to Pat Robertson, "I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: if there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God, you just rejected Him from your city."

Reverend Robertson, What The Hell Were You Thinking?

No one in Dover voted for the pro-intelligent design candidates? One would expect that if there were a disaster in the area, voters who voted for the pro-intelligent design candidates would be affected as well as the sinners. What about people who voted a split ticket? How would that work? If you voted for even one anti-intelligent design candidate are you doomed? Since this was an election, maybe God works on the simple majority rule. You are OK if you voted for more pro-intelligent design candidates than anti-intelligent design.

I might have some respect for televangelists if they weren’t millionaires who make a living retailing salvation.

Rev. Robertson believes so strongly in the power of prayer I thought about suggesting we all pray for some painful affliction to strike him. Something like facial shingles every time he makes an outlandish statement. Then I realized it had already happened. He already suffers from chronic stupidity and unremitting foot in the mouth disease.

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