Saturday, August 06, 2005

Straight From The Cow's Mouth

There has been some controversy over a previously published post here at EverybodyHasOne, Some people have commented that something about the post "Cow Farts Threaten National Security" doesn't smell right.

In order to set the record straight, EverybodyHasOne has, at great expense, travelled to rural Illinois to get the story direct from the horses mouth, so to speak.

EverybodyHasOne went to the dairy farm of Mr. McInthedell. When asked if it was true that cows produce prodigious amounts of gas, McInthedell replied, "As a member of management I don't think it is in the farm's best interest to make statements that might bring stress to the barn. It hurts milk production." He refused to answer anymore questions, but did make this comment as he walked away, "Off the record, there is a reason we bottle milk here and not perfume".

Readers may be wondering why EverybodyHasOne printed McInthedell's comment since it was off the record. Until the courts rule whether or not bloggers are real journalists, be careful what you say.

EverybodyHasOne then went directly to a cow for her comments. The cow, who said her name was Bessie (a source who wished to remain anonymous said her real name is Bossie), was only too eager to talk.

"Most cows would like you to believe that only the bulls 'honk the horn', as we like to call it. But that is a dairy barn over there and they don't milk bulls. You walk in there and tell me cows don't toot. They do--and a lot."

She went on, "I could name names, but she's a favorite of old farmer cold hands. If I say anything bad about her I'll be the first cow milked all winter."

So there you have it, the unbiased truth straight from the cow's mouth.

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Straight From The Cow's Mouth

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