Monday, August 15, 2005

NRA Stalls Iraqi Constitution

EverybodyHasOne, in an exclusive report, has learned that the creation of a new Iraqi constitution was actually stalled by the NRA. It seems the NRA wanted the following clause added to the constitution:
No laws may be created that infringe upon the right of any Iraqi citizen (except women) to own and bear arms (defined here as any device containing explosive materials, such as hand guns, assault weapons, machine guns, rocket propelled grenades, mortars, etc.).

When Iraqi representatives balked at including this clause and when no compromise could be reached (i.e. the NRA didn't get it's way), the NRA halted the entire constitution drafting process which required a time extension.

One Iraqi delegate pointed out that such a broad definition of arms prevented the outlawing of IEDs (Improvised Explosive Devices). NRA spokesman, Wayne LaPierre reportedly responded, "IEDs don't kill people. People kill people."

There was an attempt to keep the process moving with a promise to consider the clause as an amendment. Wayne LaPierre, again speaking for the NRA reportedly said, "Bearing arms is a god given right and deserves to be in the constitution, not in some stinking amendment! Been there, done that. "

Political insiders say that the Bush administration is in a quandary. It wants an Iraqi constitution soon, but it can't afford to offend the NRA. An unnamed source claims that Karl Rove has pictures of all of the Iraqi constitutional convention members in lurid, homosexual encounters and promises to make them public if any member continues to oppose the amendment.

Ask candidates for office if they take money from the NRA and if they do, don't vote for them.

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